Friday, October 12, 2007
Out of Hiding
A year has almost passed and I have not written one real blog entry. Mind you, its not that I haven't wanted to, but I have allowed time and circumstances to put me in a state of hibernation, if you will – a state of walking sleep. It's in this state that I have been hiding from the rest of the world.
As I reflect on the last year, I can see it's not just the blogging that went lacking. My art aspirations also went largely neglected, so did my poetry. Had it not been for one of my best friends, I probably would not have done any art this year at all. Oh my.
The sad part of it all is that some of the things I was inspired to write about or paint about are now lost forever in the background of my mind…yet, others still linger. So as I begin to push myself to pursue new creative endeavors, my mind is haunted with images of incomplete projects, unwritten prose and yet to be shared revelations.
All of this made me think: How do I call my self a writer and not write, how do I call myself an artist and not create? While yes all of us have our moments of "lagging", what I have done is nothing but pure procrastination. My lapse had nothing to do with a lack of inspiration. I have been inspired to write poetry. I have been inspired to write blog entries. I have been inspired to create several paintings & to finish the ones that are still not finished, but I have also chosen to put it off until later …because I don't have the time or such & such needs me right now or my business needs all my attention…until I forget and "lose the moment".
Ultimately all these excuses have culminated in a year's worth of nothing in the very areas that mean the most to me. With that in mind, I have decided to make a change: to come out of my walking hibernation and put myself out there. It doesn't matter if people read my blog or not, whether they like my poetry or they don't, whether my art moves them or it doesn't. What matters most is that it makes a world of difference to me. My spirit longs for these forms of expression to feel complete. It is for that reason that I am that I intend to push myself to be the creative person I was meant to be. To show the world and myself what I've got. To wake up and get out and come...out of hiding…
at 2:05 AM